How to Respond to Criticism
Dear Friends,
It seems that many news stories are little more than intensified finger pointing. Somebody is always blaming or attacking or criticizing somebody else for perceived and legitimate wrongs. It’s tiring enough to listen to when those attacks are directed at someone else… it can cause considerable anxiety when those attacks are directed at you.
Let’s be up front about this: there are still plenty of people who do not understand our passion for our work as a ministry, and who disagree with our intentional use of Biblical wisdom to guide financial and life counsel. We’ve all seen it, heard it, and maybe even experienced it firsthand. Since we’re only human, our feelings can be hurt and our emotions can become riled when we feel criticized or attacked. And since we’re only human, it’s natural to want to defend ourselves – to tell our side of the story – and convince the other person that they are wrong and we are right. Just recalling a time when you were in this situation can make you feel the anxiety level rise!
Return to God’s word for guidance on how to respond, remembering three important truths:
1. I never need to defend myself – God is my defender and He will take care of it.
2. I never need to attack another person – I don’t know how God may be using them, and besides, God is the judge of their behavior, not me.
3. I must always be willing to listen – not to other people – but to what God has to say to me.
It’s not always easy to live out these truths when in the midst of a heated situation. I encourage you to reflect on God’s message in Psalm 81: 11-12 (KJV): “But my people would not hearken to my voice; and Israel would none of me. So I gave them up unto their own hearts' lust: and they walked in their own counsels.” He’s telling me that even when I am tempted to defend myself and attack another, I should not follow the path that my human emotions might think is the best resolution. Instead, if I listen to God’s word and what He says about protecting His children, He will take care of the situation for me and for the other person so that it has the best outcome for everyone involved.
My mentor, Howie Hendrix, often said that we don’t know how God is using another servant or what He has in mind. When someone questioned the behavior of another Christian (like Billy Graham was questioned), Howie replied that the better question to ask is, “How can God use you?” In other words, worry about your own relationship with God and don’t worry about something you can’t know the answer to!
I want to listen to what God is saying to me and not what anyone else is saying about me.
Have you felt that your counsel or faith was being attacked and you were tempted to defend yourself? How did you overcome that temptation to “get into it” with another person and what were the positive outcomes? Share your story below and inspire others.
Blessings,
Ron
Thanks, Ron! I needed that! May the LORD's many blessings follow you and the ministry of KAs around for months and years to come!
Reply to this
Thanks Ron for some much needed advice. I will now leave it to a much better person to do what I so poorly tried to do.
God is always good!
John T. Carr
Reply to this
Ron,
Thanks for this reminder about allowing God to be our defender. In the Bible where God leads there is victory, when believers go ahead of Him there is defeat. If the criticism is a problem, we need to get over ourselves (pride) and into His will.
Reply to this
Ron: like gold apples in a silver is a word spoken in season. we have recently changed churches after 19 years and tried to do all things in a biblical, quiet way. We firmly believe it is God's will for us to make the change. Of course misunderstandings take place and what you have shared in this time has found a home deep within us.
Reply to this